Gary Varvel: Father's Day advice

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GARY VARVEL

JUN 14

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I was inspired by GOP Rep. John Rose’s son who upstaged his father by making faces during his dad’s speech on the floor of the House. Likewise, Hunter Biden’s conviction has upstaged his father’s gun control speech this week.

President Biden said that he is not going to pardon his son. Obviously, pardoning him before an election could be political suicide. But after the election, win or lose, there’s nothing to stop him from pardoning Hunter.

by Gary Varvel, published in 2022

When I became a father 40 years ago, I had an advantage many fathers don’t have today. I had Forest Varvel. He’s my dad. He went home to be with the Lord in 2014. Everything I needed to know about being a husband and father I learned by watching him.

America is suffering from dad deprivation. And children aren’t the only ones who suffer; so does the rest of the country. Many of society’s ills are the result of boys not having a father. According to Dr. Warren Farrell, “Six of the seven mass school shooters who killed 10 or more people. In all six, from Salvador Ramos to Adam Lanza, the boys were deprived of their biological father.”

America also suffers from failing fathers. It stands to reason that boys who grow up without a father, haven’t learned how to be a father to their children.

My dad, on the other hand, taught me a lifetime of lessons on being a good dad. I have passed those lessons on to my children and they are all successful adults.

Here are just 8 principles I learned from my dad on how to be a good, no great father.

1. Get married before you have children. It's the right thing to do.
2. Love your children's mom. My dad loved my mom for 62 years and I learned that love is not a feeling, it’s a choice. I grew up knowing peace and security in our home because I never feared that my parents would divorce. (Ephesians 5:25)
3. Spend lots of time with your children. Our family is close because we shared life experiences. We ate meals together, vacationed together, watched TV together. My parents attended my school activities, sports, and plays. Time together is what makes a close-knit family. (Deuteronomy 6:5-9)
4. Lovingly talk with your children. My father often verbalized 3 things to me that every child needs to hear from their father. "I love you," "I'm proud of you" and "you're good at (something).”
5. Study your children. My dad recognized my fascination with the artwork in MAD magazine. So he bought me copies of MAD which set me on a path that led to a career in cartooning. I, too, studied my three children and encouraged them to pursue their strengths. Today, my two sons are both Emmy Award-winning filmmakers and my daughter is an award-winning graphic designer and all of them are following Jesus. (Proverbs 22:6)
6. Discipline your children. Author Josh McDowell said, "Rules without relationship leads to rebellion.” The goal of discipline is to train your children the life skills they need to become responsible adults — like, delayed gratification, respect for authority and empathy for others. Loving discipline when children are young will keep them out of trouble and save yourself a lifetime of grief. (Proverbs 29:17)
Never discipline in anger. Whenever I had to discipline my children, I always hugged them afterward and told them, "I love you." (Hebrews 12:7-11)
7. Have fun with your kids. My dad taught me to play baseball, basketball, bowling and chess. He also had a great sense of humor. He loved to laugh and make our family laugh. He taught me to see the humor in life’s difficulties. (Ecclesiastes 8:15; 1 Corinthians 10:31)
8. Teach your children about God. This is the most important lesson my dad taught. He took our family to church. He also read the Bible, prayed and talked about God in our home fulfilling the commands in Deuteronomy 6:6-7. His faith was contagious.

John Adams, the second president of the United States, said, “Our constitution was made only for a moral and religious people. It is wholly inadequate to the government of any other.” He was right.

As Americans became less religious, they became less moral which resulted in broken homes, broken neighborhoods and broken cities. All because fathers failed to teach their children about their Creator.

On this Father’s Day, I pray that fathers everywhere will give their children what they really need, which is a good dad.

Thank you for supporting my work and reading this article. — Gary Varvel

The official trailer for DISCIPLES IN THE MOONLIGHT directed and produced by my son, Brett Varvel. This movie will be in theaters nationwide July 17-24th.

Go to FathomEvents.com TODAY and order tickets. I will announce soon when and where I will be watching if you want to join me in a Central Indiana theater, stay tuned.

Please take some friends with you to see the film in theaters. If we get a good turnout, it will stay in the theaters longer.

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Contact me for a unique experience of visual and verbal humor. Email: gary@garyvarvel.com